Iron Santa!

March 1985

G.I. Joe #33

Hello, loyal comic book ad enthusiasts! Sorry I missed last week – I was busy with Christmas stuff. But you know who else is busy with Christmas stuff? Iron Man! Yes, he’s bringing folksy, outdated, generic toys to all the girls and boys! …Or maybe he’s just trying to get you to buy comics.

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Only 42¢ per copy?! What I wouldn’t give for that price (or even the full cover price of 60¢) these days! Why/when/how did comics get so expensive? Most new issues I buy are $3.99 each! Oh, well – maybe if I’m lucky I’ll find some comics under the tree this year!

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to everyone out there!

 

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Tons of Newtons!

March 1985

G.I. Joe #33

Ah, the fun of a game included within an ad! Here we get to help a pirate through a maze to find a treasure chest full of tasty Fig and Apple Newtons! I’m sure that fun ads like this still exist, just in places I don’t see them – but I just always associate stuff like this with the ’70s and ’80s.

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I’ve never really thought of Newtons as cookies, but that’s how they describe them here – huh, new perspective, I guess.

Build Your Own GoBots!

March 1985

G.I. Joe #33

I used to have GoBots as a kid (in fact, I still have those GoBots!) – they were cool because they were the same size as Hot Wheels, so you could play with them with all your other cars!

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So when I first saw this ad, I initially thought it was for the standard GoBots toys, but apparently this is for models of the toys… kind of odd, but OK. It looks like they actually do transform, so I’m guessing the main difference is that you put these together yourself? Or maybe they’re more detailed than the regular toys? Not really sure on that.

An All-Star Lineup!

March 1985

G.I. Joe #33

Star Comics was a division of Marvel that printed comics aimed at young kids, and mostly titles based on TV shows. I remember a few of these shows from my youth, but Ewoks was the only one that really stands out to me.

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You may notice “Peter Porker” as one of the titles – although this could very well be taken in a decidedly non-child-friendly direction, the full title of this is actually “Peter Porker, The Spectacular Spider-Ham” – yep, a pig as Spider-Man!

Spider-Man vs. Molestation?

March 1985

G.I. Joe #33

I’ve seen Spider-Man fight a lot of evil over the years, but this is the first time I’ve seen him target sexual abuse (and just for the record, I’ve never actually read any Power Pack comics, but I imagine this would be a bit out of the norm for them too).

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I was actually pretty surprised by the forwardness of this ad, especially for something aimed at kids, but it certainly gets the point across!

I love that you can order a special Marvel comic about sexual abuse prevention – I sure hope that turns up in a bargain bin I’m browsing through someday!

UPDATE: I actually did find the comic in a bargain bin! Check out the CBA IRL post here!

This same ad was also found in Masters Of The Universe #1, May 1986. 

 

Do you enjoy reading Comic Book Ads? If so, please consider supporting me by clicking here for my Amazon link – I’ll get a percentage from everything you order! Thanks!

Taking Quite a Risk

March 1985

G.I. Joe #33

I’ve never actually played Risk – it seems like it would be too complicated to be any fun (for me, anyway) – but it’s been around for decades, so I guess they must be doing something right!

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“[I]t’s just like the game the big boys play” – so here they are, quite literally, calling war a game! Sorry, Parker Brothers, but I think quite a few people would disagree with that sentiment.

The Creation of Creation Cons

March 1985

G.I. Joe #33

Considering how huge and insane comic conventions have become in the last decade or so, sometimes it’s hard to imagine that they haven’t always been gigantic media spectacles. This simple list of upcoming events from Creation almost seems quaint.

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I wish they had prices listed – I’d love to be able to compare it to today’s tickets!