Don’t Use Your Karate Skills on the Seahorses!

February 1976

Claw The Unconquered #5

It’s another random grab bag of mini ads!

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The one that strikes me the most here is the one for live seahorses – they’ll send you two “freshly caught” mated pairs, with at least one pregnant. OK, I have two main thoughts on this:

  1. Sending live, pregnant seahorses through the mail seems like it would be prohibitively difficult/risky.
  2. Capturing seahorses from the wild and then sending them through the mail seems rather cruel… and seems like it should be illegal.

At least Sea Monkeys are in a type of suspended animation when they’re shipped, but live, conscious animals is a whole different story!

Stamp of Approval

September 1963

X-Men #1

Stamp collecting must’ve been big in the ’60s – on this page of classifieds the entire first column is stamps, most of the second column is stamps, and there’s even one in the third column!

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Something I’m wondering about – “approvals” – anyone know what this refers to? It’s in most of the stamp ads – “10¢ to approval buyers,” “Write today for approvals,” “10¢ to approval applicants.” Any ideas, guys?

Anyway, the thing I find most intriguing in this ad is the personal radio – “no need for batteries or tubes – no need for electric ‘plug-in’ either – diode eliminates them all forever” – well, the diode needs to get power somehow, right? If it doesn’t use batteries and doesn’t plug in, then what is it – hand crank or something?

Classifieds – Helping You Become a Tall, Fat Accountant

December 1972

Jungle Action #2

So when I first read “Rover and men on the Moon,” I took “Rover” to be a dog’s name, and assumed that the book would be something insanely awesome and/or cheesy. Alas, I now realize that they probably mean the type of vehicle instead, which is still cool, but not nearly as odd/exciting for me.

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And I’m curious to know the secret behind “BE TALLER!” – unless they’re selling platform shoes, I kind of doubt the validity of their claim.

I also like the fact that there’s a classified ad that is advertising methods for writing classified ads – it’s so meta!