Adding a Little Flair to the Game

February 1995

X-Force #43

If you know me, you know that I’m not into sports. At all. So that means I don’t have a whole lot to say about these basketball cards.

1995-02_Flair_P

It seems like collector cards were huge in the ’90s, so this is just one of the many, many sets out there at the time, trying to cash in on the craze. However, these cards do sound pretty fancy, with their “dazzling ‘hi-fi’ six-color printing, lavish foil stamping and a slick, durable polyester laminate coating.” Wait a minute – hi-fi printing? Hi-fi refers to audio! Well, if these cards make sound, then I guess they’re some really deluxe collector cards!

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Tang Team!

March 1988

Visionaries #3

Here’s your chance to join the Tang soccer team… by sending in Tang labels. Hmm… that doesn’t seem like a very effective method of finding the best players.

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Then again, membership includes “Pelé’s best soccer tips,” so I guess maybe that helps the more mediocre players improve their game.

I don’t know about you, but “Tang brand breakfast beverage crystals” sounds way less appetizing than just “Tang” – I guess maybe that’s why you don’t normally hear the full, official name.

Is That a Gun in Your Pocket, or Are You Just Happy to See Me?

February 1976

Claw The Unconquered #5

I find it kind of ironic that they’re so thoroughly emphasizing the manliness of a product called Daisy – trying to compensate, hmm?

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“Maybe Dad can help,” “handsome,” “man-sized,” “heft you can handle”… except for the “Dad” part, that sounds like it could be from gay porn! “Hey, handsome, I’ve got something man-sized with heft you can handle!” 😉

An Entirely Different Type of Hero

January 1997 (1996)

Deadpool #1

Personally, I’ve always seen comics and sports as two forms of entertainment on entirely opposite ends of the spectrum. I know that there must be some comics nerds who also watch sports, and some sports jocks who also read comics, but the idea just seems kind of foreign to me. That’s why this ad for a set of Michael Jordan videos just felt really out of place to me when I found it in the pages of Deadpool.

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I should probably make some joke about this deal being a slam dunk or something like that, but I just can’t think of anything good at the moment. Feel free to do better in the comments!