Tons of Newtons!

March 1985

G.I. Joe #33

Ah, the fun of a game included within an ad! Here we get to help a pirate through a maze to find a treasure chest full of tasty Fig and Apple Newtons! I’m sure that fun ads like this still exist, just in places I don’t see them – but I just always associate stuff like this with the ’70s and ’80s.

1985-03_Newtons_P

I’ve never really thought of Newtons as cookies, but that’s how they describe them here – huh, new perspective, I guess.

Snap Into A Smoked Beef Snack!

February 1976

Claw The Unconquered #5

I’m not really sure what the deal is with talking about werewolves here – the publishing date is February, and if things were the same in 1976 as they are in 2017, that means this was probably actually published in December, so it’s not like this was around Halloween.

1976-02_Slim-Jims_P

Based on the way they’re marketing this (comparing it to unsatisfying sugary and crunchy snacks), I was wondering if maybe Slim Jims were a new product, but it turns out I was way off – apparently they’ve been around since 1929!

And I had no idea there were so many varieties – I’ve only ever seen original and mild. Where are the pizza Slim Jims now? I want to try those!

Captain America & Nick Fury Hock Hostess Fruit Pies

April 1980

Buck Rogers in the 25th Century #7

This is by far my favorite ad that I’ve ever run across, so I thought it would be fitting for my first post. Captain America and Nick Fury use delicious Hostess Fruit Pies to save the Earth from invading aliens! Surprisingly, this didn’t come from a Marvel title (though I’m sure it was published in Marvel comics, it’s just not where I happened to find it), but from Whitman comics.

1980_Hostess-Pies_Cap+Fury_P

You know, the first Avengers movie featured an alien invasion (sorry about spoilers if you haven’t seen it yet, but I think it’s been long enough) – it seems like they could’ve solved their problem with much less fuss if only they’d had an ample supply of Hostess Fruit Pies!